“This is nothing I ever wanted, and everything I ever needed.”

This phrase drops in recently in the midst of a roller coaster ride inside my own mind in response to the outer circumstances happening in my life. In case you haven’t already gathered, I didn’t want what was happening to be happening. But it was. Hearing these words softened the experience though; reminding me I do not always know what is best for me. But that the Universe does.

On this particular day, I had the grace to see the blessing that was being offered to me, despite experiencing something I did not want. Of course, it hasn’t been like that every day. Some days, I am like a fish on a line; fighting against “what is” with every ounce of strength I have.

And therein lies the suffering. The misery. The struggle. And the blame. All centered around the fact that things are not other than what they are. That life and other people are not doing what I want them to do. Or to be.

We all know this place. We all know the internal battle that gets waged when we do not want what is happening to be happening. Maybe it’s an illness. Or the ways of the world. Or a relationship not working out. It can be any manner of things. And if we’re paying attention, we can find examples in our lives large and small, of all the things we do not want to be happening, but that are. Of the nearly continuous stream of suffering we experience daily over all the things we want to be other than as they are.

Like the weather. Or the traffic. Or what someone else is doing, believing or saying. On and on it goes. We make the mistake that our suffering will end when that thing or that person outside of us is different. Or goes away. Or just somehow lines up with our version. We can spend our lives like this. Victimized by what is outside of us. Hoping, praying, pushing, cajoling, fighting. All in an effort to get Life to line up with our very own narrative.

But if we were willing to wise up, we would see that it has never worked out. That even when we feel as though it has worked in one situation, another will arise in its place that will not respond to our efforts. It stands to reason then, that we need another way. Another approach to being in a world that will always being doing something other than what we want it to be doing.

Best I have come up with is something I once heard. “This is not being done against you, it’s being done for you.” What if we took that attitude? Of course, it would mean we would have to own up to the fact we do not always know what is best for us. That we cannot see the larger picture to know how what is happening is somehow perfect for us.

Meaning? A whole lot of surrender. A deep and abiding trust that we are are part of Something Greater. And a willingness to shift our perception away from fighting “what is,” and instead, learn to say “Yes” to What Is.