I was co-leading a series on women’s health and their journey into healing when unexpectedly, the woman I am facilitating with began what felt like a very channeled outpouring. All of which fell under the heading of, “Why Not?”
As in, why not be better to yourself? Why not take charge of your life and your health in a way that makes sense to you? Why not claim this one life of yours? Not only was the question unexpected, it was downright inspiring. Exactly where I most want to be in my life and in the company of others; exploring what is possible while blowing up false and distorted limitations.
The way this question was posed sat on the other end of the spectrum of a conversation that I had had earlier in the day. One where I was listening to a long list of “why nots.” Not in the inspiring sense, but as in why it could not happen. (Interesting that the same phrase can work in both directions.) Why they could not find a job. Why they could not do what they really wanted to do. Why it was not possible to be OK given what is going on in the world.
My goodness how easy it is to feel that way right now. So easy to fall into the mindset that what we really want cannot, or will not, happen. Given the state of affairs, who could argue? You would have to be a mad woman, beyond naive, or living in a bubble to believe anything else. Right? It seems so logical to go with gloom and doom and everything that could not possibly happen. So very, very justifiable. So realistic.
How foolhardy, foolish, risky, dangerous even to believe in the why not? of possibility and no-holds-barred. So, instead, we go along with a program that none of us actually wants; believing we have no other options. And while it may be true that the times are especially challenging, don’t we do this regardless of the times? That being, focus on why not, and not in the open and curious way, but in all of the ways that it will not happen.
But the truth is, we always have options. And somewhere deep down we know this, which is why we are so enamored with heroes and heroines across history. And do you know why we love them? Not because they were guaranteed an outcome or had all the answers. Not because they were being realistic or level-headed, but because, against all odds, they said why not? in a big and brave way. Because they decided on something and went for it. Stood by it. Lived and breathed it in ways large and small. Whether it was easy, difficult or approved of by consensus reality. Or not.
I do not think anyone has said it better than Abraham Lincoln when he stated, “Determine that the thing can and shall be done, and then we shall find the way.”
And that is precisely how it works. Something must be determined, first. And then the way reveals itself. Not, the other way around, as many of us would demand. Want in on something that links you to the greatest among us? What can you determine today? Something that you can hold to long enough to be shown the way. Because truly, why not?